my friend, Debbie

Hey all!
I am posting this to my Blogger and I will post it to my Type Pad later today (gotta get in the shower!)...


I have a friend - Debbie. She's a pretty special person - and if you'll humor me for a second, I will share a quick story.


Back in October 2005 (wow... that was a long time ago!), Chris and I were getting ready to drive to our adoption agency and hand deliver our completed dossier to adopt Amy. We didn't know who she was yet and we were still at least a little over a month away from being able to send the dossier (waiting on my 30th birthday). We made some contacts to see if anyone locally might be DTC with us and might be able to meet us for lunch.


Debbie and her hubby were planning on being DTC in December and so we met her for lunch.


SUCH a neat lady! I was looking forward to possibly traveling with her to bring our sweet Chinese-born daughters home before next Christmas (2006).


Well, SOOOOOO many factors contributed to the different roads our journies would take. Their dossier wasn't ready to go soon enough to be DTC in December and obviously, we found Amy not too many days after ours went.


And because of the drastic slow down of referrals from China, Debbie and her husband are still waiting for their referral.


Their journey has been long, but they will soon be seeing the face of their precious little Darci.


Would you consider checking out Debbie's Etsy shop? She makes beautiful coasters/trivets/decorated tiles and is selling them to raise funds to cover a recently increased orphanage donation.

trying something new...

more on this later (on this blog)
but just in case you are *dying* to see some christmas pictures...
go to

Gathering Peeps

Welcome to Our World - Chris Rice

Tears are falling, hearts are breaking

How we need to hear from God

You've been promised, we've been waiting
Welcome Holy Child

Welcome Holy Child

Hope that you don't mind our manger

How I wish we would have known

But long-awaited Holy Stranger

Make Yourself at home

Please make Yourself at home

Bring Your peace into our violence

Bid our hungry souls be filled

Word now breaking Heaven's silence
Welcome to our world

Welcome to our world

Fragile finger sent to heal us

Tender brow prepared for thorn

Tiny heart whose blood will save us

Unto us is born

Unto us is born

So wrap our injured flesh around You

Breathe our air and walk our sod

Rob our sin and make us holy
Perfect Son of God

Perfect Son of God

Welcome to our world

tagged by Joy

(And honestly - since she knows I am struggling with my picture posting, I think she is just messing with me... :) But - since I love her so much - I will oblidge!)

I am supposed to post the 4th picture from the 4th folder and the 5th picture from the 5th folder (photo folder). The disclaimer - I got a new computer before I went to China, so the pics aren't that old.

UPDATE: I can't even upload ONE picture to Blogger right now. WHAT is wrong with my stupid Blogger???

The pics would be: 4th is Anna - holding her baby in some amazing sunlight
5th - me holding my newest nephew Reed (although my brother Adam's baby boy will be arriving in our world very soon!)

dedicating abraham

I think I am on a gingerbread buzz (yes - I did destroy the house! - and darn it! It was good!).

One might have thought two little girls were high on gingergread this morning...

(this sequence was within maybe 30 seconds)

Ok - I'm not proud that I know this... but this shot reminds me of a SNL skit :)
"Hi, my name is Mary Katherine Gallegher... SUPERSTAR!"

Note the "look" the girls are getting in this shot

Temporarily Amy decides to have a seat

It was a comedy, really. And the truth is, once Amy was the one being naughty, I knew it was a lost cause.
This *is* what parenting is all about, right? Knowing what battles to choose?
They were just being little girls.

It was a fitting way to end my week (seeing today as the end of a week).
Committing to raise this little one in the LORD.
To teach him about Jesus.
To be held accountable by our church body.
Praying that he would trust Jesus as his own Savior at a young age.

It's the 5th "baby" we have dedicated with this same body of believers and this same pastor.
We committed to raising him in the local church - and Dave said something about this one or "any one in the world"
(or something like that)...
Wow.

One more thing:
If you were at our church on Mother's Day 2006
and witnessed Amy's dedication -
you would know why we didn't stop our silly, sweet little sunshine of a girl this morning.
Not the same little girl we dedicated to Him 2 1/2 years ago...

gingerbread

Gail brought Noah and Lily over yesterday to help us celebrate the first day of the big kids 16 day Christmas break!!!

Gail and I decided Thursday to have a gingerbread house-making party Friday morning.
It kinda ended up lasting 7 hours!
It was just a *little* bit chaotic, but here's the thing: it was like medicine to my soul.

I have never made a gingerbread house before. I found this recipe and modified it only slightly (I didn't have enough molasses on hand, so I topped it off with honey). It was super easy to make (although I haven't tasted it yet!) and I used her measurements for the templates. I used an empty pop can carton to cut the templates. I made a standard Royal Icing to use as "mortar".

The kids each made individual houses out of graham crackers. The only thing I wish we had done differently was to have "built" their houses in advance for them. It was difficult and we ended up doing it for them, anyway, and it was hard for them to wait for the icing to set. Each kiddo had their own ziploc baggie with icing in it and did pretty well! I even let Abe in on the action... a little. I iced some of the cookies and graham cracker pieces and stuck candy on them for him to pick off and eat! Suffice it to say - the boy got an impromptu bath in the kitchen sink when he was done.

After the kids were finished, our gingerbread had cooled. The kids went off to play (Austin and Noah were outside for hours!), Abe went down for a nap and Gail and I set to work. Ashleigh kept us company as she perfected her house with a bonfire, a pond and a fence!

Gail will likely post some pretty amazing pics later. She is very "artsy" in her photography lately :) But she did teach me something new today (we have a similar camera), and here is a little sample of that...

(OK - I AM SOOOO MAD! I have been trying to upload a few pics for over 24 hours - to no avail... I will try a few more in a separate post.)

the rest of the story

Here is the best pic of all - me holding my baby boy after he's finished.

So, I gotta share what God has done.
Not necessarily with Abe - although it certainly does have a lot to do with him.
I gotta share what God has shown me in the past 48 hours...

Tuesday, as we were preparing to leave, I was so tense. Understandable, I suppose, but I just felt so anxious. I was racing around here trying to get suitcases packed for all my family to head in four different directions.
The snow was all over the road and the thought of driving to KC in snowy and icy roads surely contributed to my feelings.
Ash was riding home from school with her friend's big brother. Austin was riding home with a friend's sister. Amy and Anna were riding with my brother to his house. All VERY responsible drivers (I do believe), but it wasn't *me* driving them.
(Have I mentioned that I kinda have control issues?)
Add to all this the fact that I was handing my 5th child - my baby - over to doctors the next day, and I was a mess.

I know these children aren't mine.
They are God's.
He's loaned them to me - for an undetermined amount of time - to parent and invest in.
I know it.
BUT - my heart was not feeling it on Tuesday.
I honestly felt like God was asking too much of me. He wanted me to offer them ALL back to him - with open hands.
I wanted to... but I didn't want to.
I wanted to because I knew it would please the Father's heart to loosen my grip; I didn't want to because I like them so much that I want to be with them.
I cried out: Father - I believe! Help my unbelief!

Of course, all the children arrived safely at their destinations and we arrived safely in Kansas City.

We purposely didn't share what the doctor sent us away with 5 weeks ago, because she wanted to confirm her suspicions and we didn't want to cause worry or concern. We investigated it a little bit, but even hesitated to do too much research. We were praying very specific things for yesterday:

-that Abe would *know* that we loved him and cared for him - in spite of us having to take him off of food and liquids in prep for the general anethesia
-that if we were making a mistake doing this too soon, God would intervene
-that God would give Chris and I the strength and wisdom to know how to best help Abraham with what he may need as a result of the diagnosis

God is so amazing! Never for a minute did I see Abe struggle with not eating or drinking yesterday morning. He was able to eat until 7 am and was able to drink clear liquids until 9:30. He signed for food at about 10 and 10:30, but I told him not now and he was fine with that. I am not sure what we would have seen as God intervening (maybe a fever?), but we didn't feel any need to postpone. And here is the really cool part... After the exam, the doctors agreed that it would take "multiple surgeries" and lots of discomfort and we would still have no guarantees that Abe would have a funtional eye. Their recommendation was no surgery. The cataract goes too deeply into his eye to remove.

Our doctor described to us what Abe's eye looked like. Basically, she said it was severely "malformed" and small. As she described it, all I could think is how badly I wanted to see it! I don't understand the science of the eye all that well, but I was just amazed at how creatively it seems that God knit Abe's eye together. Check out this post from last March. Chris and I had begun talking about adopting again at that point, but had not seen Abraham yet. I am just amazed at how God had already prepared my heart to be amazed at his handiwork! You know - we have put God into this little tiny box - assuming that a "good eye" looks a certain way and can see. He is not in a box in his understanding! He can create an eye to see or he can create an eye to display his handiwork! I believe that Abe's eye is a display of his glory for only a few to actually see and understand. Our doctor was absolutely amazed at how Abe's eye looked. The look on her face as she described it to us... Wow.

All that to say - no surgeries for Abe.
And it is just this: a small eye that is blind and creatively made. Nothing else.
He is healthy.

But that's not all God showed my yesterday...
I have prayed Phil 4:6-7 many, many times in my life. Like it was something to obtain - this peace. I often felt peace, but it always seemed something I had to get.
Yesterday God showed me that this "Peace that transcends *all* understanding" is not something I can take. It is something he alone can give. The verse says that the peace will guard my heart in Christ Jesus. I can't make it happen. God just does it. I simply must abide in it.
I did not pray those verses yesterday (although I am sure that someone did for us!).
And yet, as we traveled home, I knew that God - in his mercy - gave us His peace. A gift that I couldn't even take with an act of my will.
I get it now.
I love how God can make the scriptures come alive to us! Even ones we have known our entire lives!

And now for one more picture...

"I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made!"
(Abe's little feet right before going in for his ultrasound)

Abraham's visit to Children's Mercy

Here are some pics of our morning.
I have a LOT to say, but my brain is fuzzy right now.
After a cup of coffee in the morning, I have a few more pics and some thoughts.



Abe found the "noisy toys" in the waiting area as we waited to check him in.

Chris is pretty much thinking "ummm - yeah. Right. THAT is NOT going to make him stop crying!"
Amatuers!



Not too sure about this... (Abe OR Mom)

The hand-off

We are home.
Safe and sound.
Abe is healthy. That is the best news we could have gotten today. Thank you, LORD, for that.

There will not be a cataract surgery.

More in the morning.

Thank you for your prayers.

on our way home

We are on our way home and we can't imagine things going better than they did. I took a lot of pics today andd will blog more later.

God is so faithful and we praise Him for that!

on our way to kc

We are driving to KC right now. The snow is coming down and Abe is crying almost constantly. Please pray for us. My heart feels so heavy about something I know that many parents face every day.

they trickled...

...out of bed this morning and made a b-line for Momma's lap.
First Amy...
Then Abe...
Then Anna.

Each one making just a *little* more room.



I think I might have mentioned earlier how much I like Saturday mornings...

:)

(Ash got up and quietly avoided me and Austin finally pulled his back side out of bed at about 8. It wasn't that they wanted to sit in my lap and we didn't have room - - - they just didn't want to!)

well - DUH!

When I posted this morning, I was really fretting about that dumb memory card slot! HOW was I going to post pics of Amy and Katherine together?!
Well - DUH! - use the USB cable!
:)

Have I mentioned that Joy is a pre-school teacher?!
The best!
She brought a craft to keep the girls busy while we chatted at IHOP.



Amy showing off her snowman necklace

Oh, my word!
Look at these beautiful little girls!!!

They were SO hilarious! They started giggling and couldn't even contain their laughter! I am so glad they didn't even try!

Again - I am reminded just how blessed we have been!
Joy and Steve - thank you so much for choosing to invest in the "newbie family" almost 3 1/2 years ago...

early Saturday mornings

I love my Saturday mornings.
I still rise early (4:55), but because no one has to get up and ready for work or school, somehow the house is quiet until at least 7:00. That gives me another hour on Saturday mornings to spend doing mindless doddling online :)
Some thoughts this morning:

Abraham Caleb-Shunwei has been home for 6 weeks. Only 6 weeks?! How is that possible? He is so comfortable here - and everyone is already so comfortable with him!

Abe's sonogram of his eye is scheduled for Wednesday at 1 pm. Mommy's nervous. General anesthesia. Five kids over 12 years and this is our first "surgery". Wow.

Chris makes a very good pot of coffee - and he isn't even really a coffee drinker! Every night before he goes to bed, he makes my coffee (on a timer). I am so glad I invested 5 minutes teaching him!

Ashleigh isn't getting any younger! A good friend of mine (who also has five kids - but her youngest is a freshman in college AND they actually used to live in this house!) emailed me this week to tell me how impressed she was with Ashleigh's performance in our church's Christmas program last Sunday night. She was full of compliments on Ashleigh's character (she is also Ashleigh's SS teacher). I replied and reminded her that when she first met Ash, my baby was only a week old! Wow.

One thing I have done this morning is "investigate" (isn't that what doddling online *really* is?) how to feed my family of eight. It is an ongoing struggle. I can do it *cheap* but I think I would rather do it healthy. We have been trying to make subtle changes in the way we eat (not too much, too quickly or the kids are likely to revolt!). I have been buying organic, cage free eggs (to which the kids and Chris say "hey - these shells are REALLY thick!), trying to buy hormone free milk, etc. We bought a LOT of locally raised, hormone free meat last night. A LOT. I hope it just solidifies our committment to eat out signifigantly less. Seriously - we can't even eat at McDonalds for much less than $35!

I am very thankful that, once again, we purchased the warranty on my almost new computer. It appears that my memory card reader slot is already not working! That one accessory on my computer certainly gets a workout! I am hoping that it is an easy fix and not one that requires my parting with my little friend for too long :)

The hardest part of being a mom to three kids that are all within three years of age is the sheer loneliness I am feeling. Playdates at other people's homes are just not fun right now. Abraham is such a busy little boy that he is *constantly* into something. I can't hold a conversation at ALL. It's also pretty difficult to find a sitter for five kids (including the VERY busy boy). I am not whining. I am merely stating a fact. AND I know that this time will pass. Quickly. I just need to "suck it up" and enjoy these days. And I am.

Biggest thought this morning (and thanks for hanging in there!): thank you, Jesus, for this life! All of it! The transitions, the food, the children, the hubby, the home, the ability to have surgery, the friends, the computer, the busy-ness of a toddler boy, the quiet, the chaos (and the coffee!).

looking forward to a little "mini" reunion

A few weeks ago, Chris was putting Amy to bed and she said that a picture of her best friend had fallen off the wall and behind her bed. She started crying HUGE crocodile tears - saying that she missed her best friend Katie!
The best I can figure, she hasn't seen Katie since Chinese New Year.
I contacted Katie's mom - Joy - and we have set a little something up! I can't even tell you how excited Amy is!!!
Who's Katie?
Read this "old" post to refresh yourself!
Both these little girls are about to turn 5 years old! That is so unbelieveable! It seems like just yesterday that I met Steve and Joy and their sweet little one year old - Katherine. I was such a bumbling idiot when I met Katie! Steve was holding her and I will never forget it! I was that crazy "waiting mom" - the one who is just desperate to get a connection to their child (who we didn't even know yet). I don't remember what I said, but I remember thinking later - "duh, Tami. You were like a freak!" But I do remember how smitten I was with Katie. It's so neat to think that God had already chosen our Amy and that she likely shared a room with Katherine for many months before Katie met her family.
So.
Lots of pics tomorrow. If us moms don't get too busy talking!
:)
Joy - I can't wait!

happy birthday to ME :)

Thirty-three.
That's me.

We loaded the troop into the Suburban and headed to our favorite Japanese grill/sushi place.
Yummmmm!

Their Christmas tree was decorated with LOTS of oragami ornaments!
Beautiful!



I am usually behind the camera, but I turned picture taking duty over to Austin for the night.

Miao stepped in and shot this pic of my entire family of 7!

Then we came home and enjoyed Mommy's favorite - Cheesecake Factory Chocolate Mousse cheesecake!
Can you say "YUMMY!"?



They seated us at dinner with a poor, unfortunate couple... Out for the night - without kids!
As they were leaving, they blessed us by contributing to our bill. The husband looked at Chris and I and said "you are VERY blessed...".
I almost started crying!
Not that I haven't almost cried or actually cried several times already today!

Here's the deal:
God can use junk.
He's so awesome and can do ANYTHING without us.
But -
he works in our incredible weakness in order to bring glory to HIS NAME!

He's been working with this junk heap for thiry-three years now.

Three years ago, I celebrated my 30th birthday - meaning we could finally send our dossier to China - in hopes of adopting a little girl we would call Amy Carmichael. Then came Anna Chenghao (my 31st birthday present was her referral!). Nothing "exciting" for my 32nd birthday...
Yet, here I am on my 33rd birthday with three amazing gifts from China and two home made gifts.

Not all the changes in the past three years are seen with the eyes...
God has taught me SO much.
I have been thinking all day how best to articulate that.
I got nothing.
So, I trust that God knows my heart and that you just come along for the ride.

All glory to Him!

christmas decorations are at a minimum this year.
we're keeping it simple and it feels good.



we have boxes and boxes (and more boxes) of "stuff" in storage, but when it came to putting it all out, it just didn't feel right.
not as funky as three years ago...

i was newly home from cleaning up in new orleans - post katrina.
i picked through the shed of the family we helped. much of their christmas decorations ruined; covered with a muddy muck.
seriously - i had to go talk to my pastor about it.
no decorations.
no christmas shopping at that point and it was december 19 - i believe.
i did finally pull it together - a little.

this year isn't funky and depressed.
it's just different.

so, we chose to focus on just a few special things.
our tree has just our family ornaments on it this year and it's joined by what i hope will be a new tradition - a gratitude garland!
we put the tree up before thanksgiving and made a chain garland out of strips of paper that all of us wrote what we are grateful for on.

and this:

is a very special little something that my mom gave me for me birthday several years ago. she said it reminded her of me and christopher when we were little. i love it.



On our mantle is a simple nativity and a st. nicholas - with evergreen, candles and antique (not really - but they look like it!)
glass ornaments. you will also notice to the right of the fire :) is a little sleigh with stuffed snowmen (gotta have *something* that abraham can touch!)

here's our little coat rack right inside our front door.
again - simple.

destined to be...

...my day today.



my littlest man just wants to be held.
i can't decide which is easier - carrying the 25 lb kid or chasing him?

there has to be *some* weight loss for this - right?
or maybe
it will just hold off the added lbs from fudge?

no words...

(maybe a few... this is what most of the pics looked like!)

happy birthday, ashleigh!

(I tried to blog this last night, but the pics disappeared!)

My first.
I messed up SO many times.
I still do.
I wish she had Amy, Anna and Abe's mom; she's more laid back.
More patient.






Seriously.
There are two boys and two girls that are blessed to have her as "big sister".
She leads them well.



She may LOOK like me, but she is SO much like her Daddy.
When I saw this sweater, I KNEW she would look awesome in it! She liked it when she opened it, but like her Daddy, I am sure that her next thought was... "Hm. I wonder if I will be *comfortable* in this?"



I don't know what she wished for...



...but I know she has the determination to make it happen.

I am sure that God smiled on November 30, 1996 when he breathed air into this precious one's life.
I know he smiled when she trusted his Son as Savior when she was three.
I know he smiles every time she chooses to put others before herself (which she does often).
I know he is smiling as he thinks of the future he has planned for her.

I love you, Ashleigh Ciera.
I am SO PROUD of the young lady you are becoming.